Since I posted a recent complaint about how the movie (and presumably this site) might be aiding terrorists, I figured I’d pull out an old one. I had this email exchange back in April:
From: complainant
To: SoaB
are you not afraid that this can give terrorists ideas to bring in snakes on a plane, if they can bring in weapons snakes are a piece of cake.there is a war going on stop giving people ideas.From: SoaB
To: complainant
I presume you’re joking.
From: complainant
To: SoaB
no am not joking. is it impossible?.am already afraid of flying as it is
From: SoaB
To: complainant
I would argue two main points:
1. Why would you blame me, somebody running a webpage, and not New Line, the company who’s actually producing a movie about Snakes on a Plane? Clearly if somebody is giving ideas, it’s them more than me.
2. If a terrorist is looking to hurt people, they certainly don’t need movies to give them ideas. It’s not especially hard to think of scary things to do, adding more to the list doesn’t increase their opportunities or the likelihood that they’ll carry those ideas out. It’s not like somebody is sitting around saying “Gosh, I would love to do something terroristic but I just don’t have any ideas…” and then suddenly a movie comes on TV and they’re chock full of new, movie-inspired ideas. Quite honestly, the idea of a terrorist using snakes is much less frightening than the idea of a terrorist using bombs.
From: complainant
To: SoaB
is it actually less frightening at least there would be flight marshalls in flights to help but if there are dangerous snakes aboard (noone knowing where they are)even the marshalls would be afraid not knowing where they are hiding.when the film comes out you will begin to see the effect on the populace it’s all fun and good now. meanwhile i blame you for now because you are hyping it more than newline cinema.think future not just present. frequent flier miles will soon be on sale everywhere. airlines should start bringing out their PR guys to calm the public.for me bye bye planes hello cars and buses (at least they can stop and passengers can jump out the window)
At this point I asked her to write up her beliefs into something that I could post by itself, but I never heard back from her.
Man that’s some good stupid. Hilarious.
Why do you give these people the dignity of taking them with even an ounce of seriousness, and taking the time to answer them reasonably? My reply to the first e-mail would have gone something like this:
“Actually, I’m an anarchist. I believe that America has too much wrong with it, and that nothing will change unless Americans can be shocked out of their complacency. I also believe that knowledge is free and should be spread. I want this movie to come out so that the entire populace will know EXACTLY the step-by-step method that they need to go through to get snakes onto a plane and have them released by a timer. Also how to drug them so that they will attack all passengers and pilots. Also how to get them to bite men on their penii (to help the overpopulation problem). The reason I’m supporting this film so much is that I know that people like you will try to stop it from coming out, so that people won’t have this information. I am doing my part to make sure that the people know how. VIVA LE REVOLUCION!”